“Some changes look negative on the surface but you will soon realize that space is being created in your life for something new to emerge.”
-Eckhart Tolle
Has a Significant Life Change Caused You Feelings of Grief, Self-Doubt and Uncertainty?
Do you feel lost, overwhelmed or anxious as you face a period of transition? Has a life change—whether planned for or completely unexpected—swept the rug out from under you, making you question your identity, values and purpose? Perhaps you are struggling to cope with the end of a relationship or the death of a loved one. Or, maybe your children have left home, and although they remain part of your life, you feel lonely and unsure of what to do with your time. If you or your partner are pregnant or have begun having children, you may feel torn between joy and terror, afraid that you will do something wrong or that you aren’t ready.
You might be facing a career change—or retirement—and wondering how to balance a desire for fulfilling work, responsibilities at home and internal anxieties about your capabilities and skills. Perhaps you’ve just earned your degree and feel completely stuck, paralyzed by all of the choices before you. Alternately, you might be struggling with profound changes or discoveries about your body, such as menopause, an illness or an injury, that fill you with grief or a sense of loss. Do you feel unequipped to handle the challenges of this new life stage? Do you wish you could find the support and guidance you need to identify your values, live authentically and move forward with self-assurance and confidence in who you are?
Regardless of the life transition you are facing, significant changes in your career, relationship or health can feel frightening, complex or hopeless. As you weigh your options and consider what you are going to do next, you might keep running into a wave of fear— a fear of failure, rejection, discomfort or enormous challenges that you don’t feel ready to face. You may not even be sure of what you are afraid of, but feel on-edge, anxious and unable to identify what you really want. Perhaps part of you wants to stay right where you are, in a cocoon of familiarity, while another part of you feels smothered and craves a more fulfilling, satisfying life.
You Are Not Alone
The only constant in life is change. The external world is always changing around you, and internally, you are growing and evolving as well. However, just because change is inevitable, it doesn’t mean it is easy. Every person is faced with challenging life transitions that push him or her to ask difficult questions about identity, values, hopes, fears and needs. The process of self-exploration can be very uncomfortable, distressing and scary, and it’s common to feel a great deal of anxiety when facing change. Anxiety may be tempting you to stay put or wish that you could go back in time. But, if you are suffering or feeling hurt and lost, standing still can keep you stuck in thought and behavior patterns that are no longer serving you.
All of us have those inner voices that tell us we’re not strong enough, smart enough or good enough to overcome obstacles or create the lives we want. Even if you feel like you are suffocating under the weight of the choices before you, you are not broken or incapable. You are simply a human being.
The good news is that you can use this transition as an opportunity for growth. Life change counseling can help you learn to push through your fears and view change—even the most sudden, painful change—as an opportunity to get in touch with your true values. There is hope for a new, more fulfilling life.
Life Transitions Counseling Can Help You Discover Your Internal Strength
If you feel stuck fearing the future or grieving the past, but feel eager to live in the present, I can help. It is possible to get in touch with your innate power, gain a new perspective on the difficulties in front of you and learn effective ways to manage the stress and anxiety that come with change. With support and guidance, you can better understand your locus of control and feel more empowered and equipped to live a life aligned with your deepest values.
In life transition counseling sessions, I will hold space for you to explore the fears that are keeping you stuck. You can speak openly and honestly, without any fear of judgment. Through a form of empowerment counseling, I can help you feel heard, understood and validated, as well as challenged to let go of fears or harmful self-talk that is not serving you. Many of the anxieties that come with life transitions stem from fear of the unknown, and no person can change the unknown. As your therapist, I will help you shift negative core beliefs and clarify what you have power to change and what you don’t. While the external world can sometimes be difficult to navigate, you always have control over how you perceive changes and challenges. I believe that you have the strength to reframe problems and shift your perception. External forces do not have to shake your foundation or throw you into distress. You can handle whatever life throws your way.
During life change counseling, I will not tell you what to think or what to do. Instead, I will help you uncover your inner truth and gain clarity about what you want to cultivate in your life. As you align with your values, you can identify which thoughts or behaviors are in line with those values, and which are preventing you from living as your most complete, authentic self. You have your own answers, and in sessions, I can help you clear away self-doubt so that you can trust those answers to guide you.
I know both personally and professionally how difficult and painful change can be. I’ve encountered changes that felt like the worst moments of my life, however, I also know that change can be a gift. Transitions serve as an opportunity to explore wants and needs, enter a new stage and to take a step toward living authentically. With help, support and willingness to self-explore, you can to respond to change, experience profound growth and create a better, richer, more satisfying life.
You may believe that life transitions counseling can help you find answers and clarity, but still have questions or concerns...
I should be able to handle this myself. Something must be wrong with me...
In our culture, we are raised to think we need to be self-sufficient and independent, when, in reality, human beings are hard-wired to seek comfort, care and connection from other people. We wouldn’t have survived as a species if we didn’t have each others for support. There is nothing wrong with reaching out for help when you’re feeling lost and overwhelmed.
It can be so difficult to look at your problems and weigh your choices objectively, especially when those problems and choices carry painful emotions and bring up internal fears and doubts. As your therapist, I can offer objective, compassionate guidance and support, as well as a safe space for you to explore what you really want.
Life transitions counseling is going to make me face uncomfortable topics...
It’s natural to feel resistant to change. But, the desire to avoid uncomfortable topics is actually a great reason to seek life change counseling. It’s important to work through complicated thoughts and feelings in a non-judgmental space. Regardless of what you are going through, it’s empowering and comforting to have someone on your side.
You’re just going to judge me or misunderstand me...
I will never judge you or make you feel as though you are doing something wrong. The truth is, you aren’t. Even if you feel ashamed of some of you current behaviors, know that you are doing the best you can with the tools and strategies you’ve developed throughout your life. In sessions, I can help you identify which of those tools are now harming you more than helping you. You can develop new strategies to cope with distressing feelings and uncertainty. We can get to the root of your values so that you can begin making choices and engaging behaviors that help you on your way to who you want to be.
You Can Live an Authentic Life
You don’t have to navigate this challenging time on your own. I invite you to call me at 480-427-3553 for a free, 15-30 minute phone consultation or contact me here. We can discuss your specific needs, and I can answer questions you have about life transitions counseling and my practice.
